Aim True - Day Four

This entire sentence is a link to the class I am talking about today. =)


Learn to Kick Up in the Middle of the Room
Vinyasa Flow
Level 2
Kathryn Budig

A heat building and playful flow focused on inversions. Learn the tools to become comfortable with kicking up in the middle of the room. Explore the core strength and stability of the shoulders to adventure into forearm balance and two second series headstands. 

First posted on YogaGlo on April 3, 2010, I never took the class until today. This is not a shock. Kicking up in the middle of the room is one of my least favorite things in the world.

4/83 classes complete.
2/4 had taken at least once before.

Finally. Finally I don't feel like cement. Today was the day that I finally reconnected with MY body and MY practice of yoga. Don't get me wrong. This class was still more difficult for me than it would have been a year ago. But the cement days are over - for now - and I felt myself moving into a place of strength and endurance. It felt so, so, so good.

The most obvious place I feel stronger is in my shoulders and arms. This class had a LOT of opportunities for advanced inversions. I did not take those opportunities. I stuck with dolphin pose when Kathryn was teaching second series Ashtanga headstands. (Hell, I may stick with dolphin EVERY time someone teaches me second series Ashtanga headstands for the rest of my life, and I'm okay with that.) I used the strap around my upper arms and the block (this is such a genius use of props that for some reason I rarely take advantage of - I'm teaching it tomorrow for sure) and that was when I really started to realize that my shoulders were starting to feel stronger. I did headstand prep (essentially dolphin pose on the crown of your head) and whereas a few weeks ago I struggled to lift my shoulders enough to take it out of my neck, today I could have easily slid a piece of paper under my head, no problem. And it felt sweet and easy. Okay, not EASY like sitting on my ass watching a movie easy, but you know, EASY relative to yoga.

I obviously adore Kathryn Budig's style of teaching or I wouldn't have been taking her classes for so long, or have gone to Nashville for her backbend workshop, or have embarked on this challenge. And part of the reason I like taking her YogaGlo classes is because they challenge me, and they keep my practice at a level a bit more advanced than what I teach. But man, I think she skimps on the savasana. Just a couple of minutes is not nearly long enough for me to truly relax, truly drop in, truly start feeling and receiving the reverberations of my practice. But then again, I'm a Kripalu trained yoga teacher, and there is a lot more emphasis placed on the meditative side of yoga practice in the Kripalu tradition. I love that, I teach that, and when I practice on my own (which I decided today I'm going to do once a week in addition to my five KB classes) I focus on that. Maybe all of those LA yogis are just too type A to be still for any length of time. ;)

I'm excited aim true for a fifth day with my friend Christi tomorrow. She has a beautiful yoga room in her house, and we're going to practice together. And then watch movies and have cocktails. Yay!

Your friend, the Reality Yogi

Let's say it's the end of a long day and you FINALLY have a bit of downtime to yourself. And if we're being honest (and we are, or at least, I'm about to be) you're probably most likely to grab a glass of wine, or maybe some chocolate, and definitely a lime La Croix, and sneak a moment to catch up on your DVR. Maybe it's Top Chef, Housewives, Weeds, The Sing-Off, or a Hereos marathon on Netflix. Or some Law & Order: SVU. Or you catch up on your internet-world for a minute - Gmail, Facebook, Twitter, Blogger. Maybe read a few Mind-Body-Green posts or the YogaGlo blog. Or maybe you do both at the same time. (By the way, if this is true for you, word for word, it also seems that WE ARE THE SAME PERSON. Haha!) And then you think, because you're my yoga student, hmm, my yoga teacher is always saying to incorporate yoga in my REAL life, to do a few poses before bed, maybe 15 minutes in Legs Up The Wall or something like that. BUT WAIT! She also says that my yoga practice is supposed to be this sacred, spiritual time - so I have to choose!

OH MY GOD I HAVE TO CHOOSE BETWEEN HOUSEWIVES OR ENLIGHTENMENT?!?!? NOOOOO!!!!!

(this may, actually, be true, but, we'll just overlook that for the moment!)

=)

Okay. You don't have to choose. At least, I don't think you have to choose. Here's what I've figured out, on my personal journey of yoga - in my own practice.

Have your wine, have your chocolate. Drink your La Croix. Watch Housewives. Or ESPN. Or the History channel. Or listen to your favorite very UN-YOGIC music. Whatever floats your boat. And while you do:

• Spend 20 deep, full breathes in PIGEON pose on the right leg.
• Keeping the right leg forward, bring the left leg around, foot to the outside of the right thigh, and TWIST to the left for a few breathes.
• Bring the left leg down on top of the right, shins and knees stacked, coming into DOUBLE PIGEON for 10-20 breathes, folding forward over the hips if it feels right.
• REPEAT on the LEFT side.
• Sit in SUKASANA - easy pose, or simple cross-legged post and take a few, long deep breathes. Maybe a few Ujjayi breathes. Notice how you feel.

(All the while, you're still paying half your attention to listening to Camille and Kyle discussing Taylor's marriage, or Kim being totally crazy, or Lisa and Adrienne just being uber rich. Or all of them screaming at each other. Simultaneously.)

Listen, I'm not saying this should REPLACE your mindful, focused SADHAHA, or practice of yoga. Truly. I know I could catch a lot of flack from some yoga camps that think that if you're not completely focused on your alignment and breath (because, let's face it, you CAN'T be totally mindful or those things when you're also listening to Housewives, and yes, yoga is the cessation of the fluctuations of the mind) then you're not doing yoga and you're risking injury. But at the same time, as an ADDITION to your mindful practice, this is a great way to work some additional yoga, gentle stretching and deep breathing into the REALITY of your day.

Try it. Let me know what you think. Take any modifications you need to take, and BREATHE into it.

PS - you can replace any of those shows to the shows that are YOUR guilty pleasure, that you're maybe wise enough to keep to yourself, unlike me. ;)
PPS - My other favorite, which takes just about the same amount of time, is 15 minutes in Legs Up The Wall. You can actually WATCH the TV, not just listen to it when you do this. =)

SHANTI!
Love,
The Reality Yogi

Aim True - Day Three

Today's class.

Neutral Pelvis Pro Flow
Vinyasa Flow
Level 2
Kathryn Budig


Learn to twist and move like a neutral pelvis pro! Flow focusing on neutral standing poses and deep awareness of the pelvis and hips. Sequence builds up to revolved triangle and camel with a soothing cool down.

This class was originally posted on YogaGlo on March 23, 2010, and I originally took it on July 28, 2011. I'm going to start keeping track:

• 3 of 83 classes completed for this project.
• 2 of 3 of the completed classes I had taken at least once before.

I had a really bad day yesterday. Outside of my practice and teaching a class, the rest of my day was pretty awful. The worst moment of my day was almost sitcom-worthy humiliating and horrifying, but something I dare not blog about publicly. Suffice to say that it was a pretty low moment, but in that moment I was also doing four other things and could not react or respond to the one thing that was shocking and hurtful. I had no choice but to retain my composure and NOT drop everything and cry/scream/make an angry phone call/write an angry email/etc. This little mocking yoga-teacher voice in my head was berating me for not being able to "breathe through" it, too. Thanks, mocking yoga-teacher voice. My yoga teacher, Priti, used to talk a lot about the "Itty Bitty Shitty Committee" that lives in your head and offers a constant negative monologue about you. My IBSC was having a very loud meeting yesterday, for sure.

All of this to say that my practice this morning was not so great. Physically, I felt pretty much the same as yesterday in terms of being warm cement, so I guess the positive is that I've apparently moved past the way I felt on day one, which was rock hard cement. But this weird pain in the backside of my upper right leg/right buttock is really frustrating during the downdog-plank-chaturanga-updog-downdog transition, which is, I dunno, pretty much ubiquitous during any vinyasa flow practice, right? Right. Mentally and emotionally I just kept revisiting the upsetting thing that happened yesterday, and had to keep trying to refocus on actually practicing yoga. Ugh.

But I got through it, and that's what matters. Day three is in the books. My hope is that I'm burning through some stuff and I'll see the results down the road. I guess you have to have these bad days at the beginning to get to the good stuff. It will be a good reminder as to why I should find more balance in my life and not let myself get this out of practice ever again.

Aim True - Day Two

I just finished THIS class.

Develop an Intelligent Core
Vinyasa Flow 
Level 2
Kathryn Budig
Description: A well rounded class focused on developing an intelligent core. Learn how to move efficiently by using the strength and openness at the center of your body.

This class was first posted on YogaGlo on March 8, 2010, and I've never taken it before today! (I have to laugh because I've taken SO many KB classes, but I always avoid anything that says word one about core work. Bring on hip and hamstring openers, even backbends. But core work makes me want to puke, quite literally. Now the inquiry, right? ;)

First and foremost, I know it doesn't seem like much, but actually completing two consecutive days of this challenge is a BIG accomplishment for me. I feel proud of myself and motivated to keep going. This is good.

I tend to over-think and over-analyze most things. My over-thinking and over-analysis doesn't usually result in any progress, though. In fact, it often results in paralysis. I just get overwhelmed by the sheer number of options or things I should and could choose to do in terms of any situation, and I stop. That's why just getting on the mat without thinking is working well for me. I'm not spending tons of time choosing what class I'm going to do, I'm just going in order from the bottom up (kind of like building a yoga pose from the ground up! Woo!) just  like if I actually lived somewhere that I could just show up at a studio at the same time every day and not have any control over the mood of my teacher that day. =)

Yoga practice is so interesting to me. I got on the mat and was so aware that I was petrified about what was going to happen. Would it be too hard? Would it hurt? Would I fail? Yep, there is the key: WOULD I FAIL? That's what was bothering me. It took me a little bit of time to drop into that place where I told  myself to do the best I could - no more and no less - and actually felt at peace with it. It's so funny that I say these kind of things to MY yoga students ALL of the time: "let go of the need to accomplish or achieve anything, and instead meet your body exactly where it is today and honor that place..." and then find myself struggling with the same fears that I'm trying to ease for my students. I feel like I can say and teach these things SO easily, but it's so much harder to hear it for myself.

I was again pleasantly surprised to find that a level 2 KB class from two years ago is pretty close to the level of class I need right now. I hate to say it's easier or less challenging, because I really feel like that is completely subjective. However, the reality is that I am CAPABLE of performing all of the postures she taught in this class, which isn't always true of her current level 2 or level 2/3 classes.

I was also pleasantly surprised to discover that I did, indeed, feel just a little bit LESS like cement today. At first I was aware of all the places I was sore from yesterday (mainly my core, actually) but as the class started going, I felt like... warm cement as opposed to rock hard cement!! And that actually felt GOOD! There are two places in my body I'm aware of some kind of nagging issue - that right shoulder thing that I blogged quite a bit about in June, 2011, and then the top part of the back of my right leg. I'm not actually sure it has anything to do with my hamstring, either. I think it might be something deeper in my glutes. Ugh. So I need to stay mindful of those spots as I practice.

I may revisit this blog post later and wrap it up better, but for now I need to eat, shower and get to work in 49 minutes.

JAI!
xo

Aim True - Day One

10:15am - pre-practice.

This is NOT a New Year's resolution. This is just a new project I HAPPEN to be starting at the beginning of a new year.

2012 - a new LEAP year at that, which is something that really excites me. The last leap year (2008) was a year of profound, positive change and transformation for me, so I'm hoping that history repeats itself.

On to the project. As a way to jump start my practice and improve my teaching of yoga, I'm going to take all of Kathryn Budig's YogaGlo classes. I think there are 86 of them as of today. My goal is five classes a week, which will take me somewhere into May, seeing as there will probably be one added at least every week.

Part of this project isn't just doing the yoga classes, but also writing about them afterward. I'm going to start from the beginning and take the classes in order and do the very best I can.

Today's class:
Open and Strengthen Shoulders and Core
Vinyasa Flow
Level 2
Kathryn Budig
Description: Sweat, action, focus and breath are the tools to work toward a long, well-deserved and deeply satisfying Savasana. A well rounded practice focusing on opening and strengthening the shoulders and core.

This class was posted on YogaGlo on March 4, 2010, and I originally took on Wednesday, December 22, 2010.

You can practice right along with me here.

xo

____
11:35am - after practice.
Cement. I am made entirely of cement. My muscles, flesh, skin, joints - all cement. Hello, I am the cement-woman.

Or at least that's how I felt for the first 30 minutes of this (excellent) class. Okay, and for the last 30 minutes, too.

Lesson learned: I am as out of practice as I feared, and definitely not as in good of shape as I was a year ago. And I do want to change that, but not in the traditional New Year's resolution way that I only associate with failure. Kathryn said a couple of times something along the lines of "let go of agenda and be open to transformation." That's EXACTLY what I struggle with. I want to make an agenda for the transformation I seek. I love reading (and doing) 30-day cleanse plans, 2-week makeover plans, highly-regimented, planned out meals and exercise schedules... but when I try to do those things, the minute I take one tiny detour (miss a workout, splurge on ice-cream) I give up and throw in the towel. I give myself no room to be human. That's exactly why I'm approaching this project, which at the core IS somewhat of an "agenda" for a certain transformation that I seek, from a place of total simplicity: Do a KB YogaGlo class five days a week and write about it as soon as possible afterward. My hope is that everything else: lifestyle changes, better nutrition, a more regular sleep schedule, more ease and peace in relationships, etc. will follow WITHOUT me having to put it all on an agenda.

Having taken a LOT of Kathryn's classes, this one was really interesting, because it's apparent that her level 2 class of two years ago is not her current level 2 class. This class was a little more beginner-focused, with a lot of emphasis on proper alignment for chaturanga and almost mini-workshoping it (for example, chaturanga from plank on the knees with ankles crossed and feet lifted, over and over again, which, umm, really burns!) and opportunities for child's pose more often than I'm used to in her classes. AND THIS WAS IDEAL FOR ME TODAY. I loved it. Let me be clear - this was a CHALLENGING class. I got nice and sweaty. But it was challenging in that it worked on the building blocks of a lot of poses I take for granted and really forced me to focus a LOT on my shoulders and core. 

I read a quote recently that said "practicing [yoga] is more difficult than teaching." It's so true. I teach a LOT of yoga every week, and that involves me physically DOING a lot of yoga every week, but it's more piecemeal, not often a full 60 to 90 minute non-stop practice with someone else calling the shots.

And, of course, I ate my fair share of Humboldt Fog and prime rib and cookies and chocolates and wine and more wine (and, umm, more wine) this holiday season. Let's be honest.

Here's to my body maybe feeling a little LESS like cement on day two! (But if it does, I'll make peace with that and get through another cement-practice as best I can.)

Dartmouth Aires

yoga update.

I just updated my website and I have to say... I'm starting to feel like a real-deal YOGA TEACHER. It's extraordinarily exciting. I have twelve weekly classes on my schedule right now, at six locations, one of which is an eight-week course I'm teaching as part of the community education program at the local community college. Just call me Professor Lowbridge! (Or, wait, I think my dad already has that one...haha). I really am excited for the opportunity to actually teach a course that builds week by week, as opposed to the majority of my classes, which are all-levels classes and attract quite a few lovely one time, drop-in, brand new to yoga types. And that, by the way, is simply wonderful in and of itself - it's really rewarding to see how deeply people can be affected by just one yoga practice. (Don't get me wrong. I've had plenty - PLENTY - of people seem deeply unaffected by just one yoga practice, and I've never seen them again...and that's discouraging and invites second guessing of myself and my abilities. Boo. But part of the yin/yang of it all, right?) But there is a different reward in being able to teach in a way that allows people to actually LEARN as opposed to just having an EXPERIENCE that they may or may not try again for two or three weeks, if at all.

I'm feeling similarly good about my meditation class I offer at my home on Wednesday evenings. There is a core group of four who attend religiously, and then four other ladies who come sporadically, a couple of whom I'd never have had the opportunity to get to know if they hadn't somehow found out about my meditation class. To quote Amy Grant: "baby, I'm the lucky one." =) I feel as though I've been able to hone a skill, that of leading group meditation practice (mostly inspired by the Kripalu tradition of non-judgmental, compassionate self-awareness). It deeply informs the way I teach my twelve yoga classes that are decidedly more asana-based.

Since this is a yoga update, apparently, I'd be remiss not to mention that for as positive as I'm feeling about my TEACHING of yoga, and my abilities therein, I'm feeling less positive about my personal practice of yoga, which really needs a jump-start. Living in a location where there is not a true yoga studio less than forty-five minutes away, it's really discouraging to not have training-opportunities, or even the opportunity to sustain a studio-based practice. I have to admit that I've used YogaGlo as almost my own yoga graduate school - I don't just practice with YogaGlo, but I actually STUDY the classes, the teachers, the styles, the alignment workshop videos - because it's the only real outside voice I have to inform my practice and my teaching. THANK THE BABY GIRAFFES FOR YOGAGLO. Sheesh. Yes, of course I stay current with Yoga Journal and various yoga websites, etc., but truly - it's not the same. It's been a year since my ten days in California during which I was very inspired by practicing at Yoga Shakti twice a day. I desperately need another California Yoga Immersion. I'd absolutely LOVE to take a class with Kathryn Budig in person, after meeting her and taking her back-bend workshop in April. In any event - I'm struggling with the INQUIRY (high-five, Kripalu Kids!) of how to boost my personal practice and feel as fulfilled in that realm as I do in my teaching of yoga.

Breath, Relax, Feel, Watch, Allow. Take a sauna.

Oh! And make these pumpkin smoothies. I'm about to do so RIGHT NOW. Particularly healthy? Nah. Dreamy looking? Yep. =)

om, shanti, shanti, shanti - om, peace, peace, peace xo